Our story is the story of two guys who start at the bottom, and with a lot of hard work continue along the bottom, and finally end up at the bottom

Thank you Flight of the Conchords for being endlessly hilarious and providing me for the title of this post.

I had been so excited at the beginning of this week for the start of the semester. I had my whole schedule lined up and sorted out. I had cleaned out my desk. I was tinkering with the idea of beginning lesson planning (I lecture my students to not procrastinate, and yet...the week before classes seems the appropriate time to open the book I’ll be teaching from doesn’t it?) I attended the mandatory orientation for my class, only to discover there was a very strong possibility that the class would get cancelled. I expressed my dismay, considering it’s not as though I teach these classes for fun or because I have nothing to do with my time but because I like to pay rent and eat! I was assured by several members of staff that even on the chance that my class would get cancelled, I would get a replacement class. All would be sorted out by the end of the week. OK. Fine.

Friday morning arrives and I receive a text from a friend of mine who had been on the wait list at the same university to teach the basic freshman class. We went to grad school together, and I’m genuinely (for the most part) glad that he got work. I sent a quick email to the scheduling director after this. I figured if someone with my exact level of education and no experience at this university, actually make that no teaching experience at all, got a job, that must mean that my job was safe. Because I figured surely you wouldn’t give a job to a wait-listed staff member when you were going to cancel the class of a staff member who’d worked there for 2 years.

Apparently, I was quite misinformed. My class was cancelled; “sometimes things just work out that way.” Really. That’s what you say to me when you tell me that I won’t be able to pay rent for 4 months without having to ask my parents for a loan? I don’t see that as helpful.

So my excitement on Monday quickly made it’s way to trepidation and stress with a dash of hope and that quickly turned into frustration, annoyance and terror at not being able to pay bills. All of this anxiety for a job that I’m not quite sure that I want...yet I know for sure that I want a place to live and food to eat.